2:50 j check insta check mail go sleep

11:51 wake up. no dresm

11:55 i look around for my phone until i find it

11:57 i text ace and kon. i also text my mom and dad. it’s the anniversary of their first date

11:59 i play obey me

12:09 i catch up on obey me and text ace and kon.  i also text my mom. she sent my brother and i a photo of us when we were young and went to the jelly belly factory.

12:11 i open instagram. i text back tycho and post the meme he sent me to mentos.illness

12:15 i check my mail. i have a reminder for my psychiatrist appointment on the eighth

12:16 i check my mail again. i sign the release of information forms for the therapy program

12:20 i speak to wendy and sam. sam is playing pokemon on his switch on the tv. my voice is so hoarse

12:25 i play flow. i do the daily puzzles and get to level 40 on the tower pack

12:27 i text ace. they confessed to their crush and she agreed to try hanging out. kon and i think it is a good thing.

12:28 my uncle sends my family a video of my baby cousin talking. i have no idea what he’s saying because of the bad quality of the video. i text ace about when i should head over

12:31 i change slippers and go outside and watch sam play pokemon for a bit. wendy and i try to convince sam that pokemon is a real gamer game and he’s a nerd. sam disagrees

12:32 i use my sweatshirt sleeve to open the bathroom door. i change slippers and use my sleeve to open the lid. i pee.

12:33 i get up flush and wash my hands with ritual but just to a count of ten for each step.

12:34 i brush my teeth

12:36 i wash my face then wash my hands no ritual

12:37 i go outside use my sleeve to open door turn off lights. i change slippers and  stand there for a minute and start to head for my room but change my mind to get water instead

12:38 i use my sleeve to open the fridge and get water. i set down my water glass grab the pie dough with my bare hands and finish it. wendy tells us about some drama happenkng

12:40 i go back to my room change slippers and sanirize my hands. i drink some water and go to my bed. i sanitize my hands and use my gloves to move my laptop near me and sanitize my hands. i log in and then grab my phone no sanitizer and it feels ok

12:41 i write everything down and scratch my chin. i sanitize my hands and then rub my nose

12:42 i scratch my chin again then play the sims

1:38 i get up put on my slippers and go close my door. i take off my shirt and stare at my body in the mirror. i admire my new tattoo and scratch my legs.

1:39 i toss my dirty shirt to the corner and go to open my clothes drawer. i realize my boxers are all in my laundry hamper because i havent put away my clean laundry yet so i close the drawer and sanitize my hands

1:40 i grab a pair of blue boxer briefs and put them on. i scratch and pick a scab on my back. i bite down on the dead skin.

1:41 i go to my bed to pick up my phone to type this all down

1:45 i message ace about heading over. i rub and scratch my nose and scratch my legs.

1:47 my mom guesses that my baby cousin said “pinche covid”. my uncle says shes right. i pick and bite at another scab.

1:48 i go to my closet and open the drawer of the tiny grey box i have there and pull out the body improvement club shirt cam got me for my birthday and put it on. i exit my closet and sanitize my hands

1:49 i grab my blue glove and use it to open the dresser drawer. i grab my jeans and put them on top of my dresser and sanitize my hands. i walk to my mirror to put on my jeans

1:50 i put on my jeans and fix my tucked in shirt. i pat down my hair but it already looks pretty good. i sanitize my hands

1:51 i grab a pair of clean socks that fell out of my laundry and put them on. i sanitize my hands

1:52 i use my blue gloves to move my laptop to my desk and move my hard drive to my desk. i sanitize my gloves take them off and sanitize my hands. i make my bed and fold my blankets. it takes a second for me to organize them the way i want

1:53 i put on my blue gloves and grab my laptop and change slippers and go to the couch where my charger is. someone unplugged it so i grab my charger and take it back with me to my room

1:54 i plug my charger in under my desk and put my laptop on my desk and charge it. i go and sanitize my gloves then take them off then sanitize my hands. i sit on my bed to type it all down

1:58 i scratch my chin and my head

2:00 i scratch the side of my head. i start to check my messages but sam comes over. he asks to come intl my room and i say yes

2:01 i we talk abojt theorizing ig. he leaves. i checked instagram to look at the account while we were talking and then i keep checking. i respond to a comment on mentos illness

2:02 i check google to make sure i got the starting date of gen z right

2:03 im panicking. i regret letting sam into my room.

2:05 i scratch my nose. i finally check my messages

2:06 i text ace again that im ready and can leave whenever. they havent responded to my first message. i check my mail. i got a confirmation mail from rogers about me signing the release of information form. i get up and sanitize my hands

2:07 i cant find my purple gloves so i take my water glass and change my slippers and bring it outside my room with me. i bring out a seaweed with me too. i set down my water glass and open seaweed. wendy is in a meeting and looks excited about my seaweed. she says crunchy out loud.

2:08 sam is trying to print something. i walk over and help him out. i start eating my seaweed. wendy asks if i can help her grab her charger and i use my glove to hand it to her. i go to my room change my slippers and sanitize my hands. i bring the bottle off my dresser and back to my desk right by the door and sanitize my hands again. i change slippers and walk out and keep eating seaweed

2:10 i finish eating and lick my fingers. i throw away the wrapper. the trash is pretty full. i go to my room and sanitize my hands and head out and sit down at the table to write it all down.

2:17 i check instagram. i get a notif from ace

2:18 ace says i can head out. unrelated but i feel faint and tired. i think im exhausted from using my laptop i feel like im about to pass out

2:19 i get up go to my room sanitize my hands grab my keys and go to my room again sanitize my hands and grab my gloves. i sanitize again and put them on the sanitize again. i grab my shoes but put them down cuz i have to get a mask. i sanitize again go to my closer open the door walk across my room to sanitize then walk back to grab a mask then sanitize again

2:20 i realize im not wearing my slippers but im wearing my socks so its ok. i sanitize again grab my shoes with one gloved hand and my sanitized in the other. i exit my room and change slippers

2:21 i put on my shoes by the back door and sanitize my hands. i unlock my car automatically being near it and open my door. i put my hand sanitizer in its spot and sanitize my hands. i open my gum jar but pause

2:22 i decide to take off my gloves sanitize my hands and get gum with my bare hands. i pop a gum into my mouth and sanitize my hands and pull out my phone. im about to text ace that im on my way but i write everything down first

2:26 i text ace and sanitize my hands

2:27 i open spotify to play ag cook and start the car. i hope bluetooth connects. im not gonna wear gloves. i sanitize again

3:05 i arrive. i sanitized not that much on the freeway but i sanitized for sure when i got off at long beach blvd. i sanitized twice at pch then i sanitized my steering wheel twice then sanitized again. then at anaheim i sanitized twice. i turned onto 12th street found parking and typed this down after turning off my car

3:07 i text ace that im walking over

3:10 i get to the gate and text ace that im here. i use the tip of my shoe to open the gate then i use my leg to open it the rest of the way. ace opens the door for me once i get inside

3:11 i come in and say hi. i play with missy and we chat and watch ace’s instagram highlight of missy

3:20 we take missy for a walk. i close the door with my elbow and my hand brushes it n i freak out internally. i also walk and make sure not to touch any cracks because something bad would happen if i did.

3:30 we come back. a nice woman came and pet missy and blessed our day. a nice man also wished us a good day. we stop and pet the pit bull that lives on the other street. on the way back we see the woman again and she says hello.

3:31 ace washes their hands in the kitchen i wash my hands in the bathroom no ritual. ace offers me a banana

3:32 i eat the banana. it feels safe cuz of the peel. ace offers that i take some back with me and i agree that it could help. it tastes really good i havent had one in ages

3:33 i wash my hands in the kitchen no ritual. i dont use a paper towel i just wipe on my pants.

3:34 ace shows me the teas they got me. they are danganronpa themed for gundham and sonia. we decide on sonia’s tea for today and ace goes to make it while i type everything down.

3:35 ace shows me a milky way tea they got and we talk about how it smells like caramel and spearmint. ace goes back to

get the boiling water and put the tea in the teapot.

3:40 ace hands me their phone to watch a danganronpa tiktok.

3:41 i finish watching and go wash my hands in tje bathroom no ritual. they feel dry.

3:44 i come sit down. we talk about danganronpa

4:12 we watch a bunch of tiktoks. we start danganronpa v3 and talk about a new anime we wanna watch together

4:13 ace brings us our tea

4:15 we look at all the truth bullets

4:31 we start the trial. i ask them if i shiuld send a meme to taylor. they say yes

4:34 i send taylor the would you guys like me if i was an emo femboy meme

4:39 she messages back

4:47 i send her a response and the fuckboy emoji to make it funny

4:48 ace holds my phone to log me into their wifi. i wash my hands afterwards

4:49 ace is making us matcha lattes

4:52 we pause the game. ace gets up to mix the matcha. we talk about how much we love kokichi and keebo

4:56 ace asks if i want whipped cream or not. i get very excited and say yes

4:58 ace brings back the matcha. i immediately get a drop on my white shirt

4:59 i grab a wet paper towel and get the stain out. it takes a few minutes. we watch some more tiktoks as we do. the computer goes to sleep.

5:08 wendy tells me about a place where i can get vaccinated. i make an appointment. we can’t synch up our times but its ok.

5:10 we find a funny american psycho themed tiktok and i send it to my brother

5:13 we dance at a fornite cover song

5:15 ace’s mom calls and asks for our orders cuz shes getting pupusas. i get two bean and cheese

5:20 i finish my matcha. it takes a lot of effort but i manage to get the whipped cream from the bottom of the mug to my mouth

5:21 i realize i have more matcha stains on my shirt. i get up to put my mug away rinse it wash hands baby ritual just count of ten for each step. i grab a papwr towel and put a teeny bit of dish soap on it and wipe off the stains. ace asks if i need a stain remover but i get them off just fine

5:22 we look at a cats instagram for a while

5:30 we talk about the cat cafe nearby and make plans to go. ace starts a fan near us cuz theyre kind of warm.

5:38 wendy texts me a photo of sam getting his vaccine !

5:44 we start the trial again

5:45 ace plugs in the laptop to charge cuz its lagging. i check texts from my mom

5:46 aces mom arrives. she says hi to me and pets missy

5:49 i react to my moms message. its the day of my dads first date with her and he’s taken her back to the restaurant where they ate. she’s sending us pictures of them now watching the sunset together. its so cute

5:50 i crack my neck twice

5:56 we pause to eat the pupusas. ace brings over horchata and their mom brings us the sauce

5:57 ace gets missy her food. i move some of the papers around oh the table so they arent near my food

5:58 i check messages and instagram

5:59 ace brings the pupusas. their mom brings us salsa

6:00 i eat my pupusas

6:08 i switch to clicking through the trial so ace can eat

6:17 ace puts away our plates. i go wash my hands with count to ten rituals

6:19 we start playing again. ace’s mom also got us horchata so i sip on that while we play

6:20 i start scratching my head. its calming so i do that for a while

6:34 we look up an answer cuz we dont wanna spend too much time. the trials are long enough as it is.

6:40 i get up and wash my hands cuz my finger brushes the table and i freak

6:42 i check instagram. ace has sent me the cat instagram.

7:09 i scratch my nose. i look at answers every once in a while because we wanna just get through it. we dance to the trial music

7:23 we finally reach trial intermission. it’s been three hours

7:25 kon sends ace and i a text of a post from xii’s blog. we click on it and it’s attack on titan. ace and i spend time going through their tumblr reblogs

8:10 kon texts us about sexy among us

8:12 we keep having trouble with the controls because they wont give us pc controls and we have to guess which keys are which

8:26 missy walks by. i pet her.

8:28 i rub my nose

8:36 i do the comic book final argument

8:40 i finish and go wash my hands 10 seconds first two steps 5 second two 10 seconds under water

8:42 i sit back down ace and i check messages and insta. i respond to kons image of eren he looks SO good

9:04 we finish the trial

9:11 we get to korekiyos execution

9:14 i find the papa john day of reckoning video for ace

9:16 i scratch my eyelid

9:18 we finish the chapter

9:20 we stop the game for today

9:22 i pick up my tupperware with the teas inside and am careful not to touch anything else. i put it down to put on my mask. ace brings me my bananas that im taking back

9:24 i pet missy’s head and hug ace. ace opens the doors for me so i dont have to touch and i use my shirt hem to open the outside gate

9:25 i walk to my car and sanitize my hands. i sanitize again and start the car. for some reason i dont allow myself to connect to bluetooth i just start driving. i turn on the seat heater and turn away the fan because i am cold.

9:53 i arrive home safe. i wasnt able to play music but i just sang ag cook to myself and worked on combining my chest and head voice since my voice has changed so much since starting T and i have to relearn how to sing. i dont have bad thoughts while driving thanks to that. i sanitize twice then exit the car. i dont bring my gloves with me but i do bring my sanitizer. i forget my bananas inside

9:54 i walk in take off shoes put on slippers then drop the tupperware and shoes off in my room as well as the sanitizer. i sanitize one more time then walk through the kitchen to my bathroom. i say hi to wendy

9:55 i go into the bathroom change slippers and wash my hands no ritual but i scrub hard. i then sit on the toilet to pee and text ace

9:56 i go #1 and 2. i text ace and kon about danganronpa and ace’s crush

9:57 i get up and wipe and flush and wash my hands. i start with my ritual to counts of ten but then im just scrubbing. i dont know how long but then i stop.

10:?? i get more soap and wash again quickly. then i get more soap and wipe down my tattoo then wash again quickly. then i wipe my hands and use the towel to dry then lift up my pants then i see that there’s hair on the sink maybe from sam shaving so i get toilet paper and wipe it down then i use more toilet paper to pick up some of the toilet paper that fell to the sides of the trash can and put it in the toilet. then i use more toilet paper to flush the toilet and then i throw it in while its flushing. then i turn around and wash my hands for several minutes until i feel them be pruny and clean.

10:08 i finish. i change slippers walk outside to my room then sanitize three times. then i go to the couch and plug in my phone and write this down.

10:14 i go to my room and sanitize my hands. i put my gloves on sanitize then unplug my laptop set it down then sanitize again. i bring my laptop out to the couch then go back sanitize my hands then bring the sanitizer with me and set it down by the couch. i sanitize my hands, use my gloves to open the laptop, then take the gloves off and sanitize again.

10:18 i check instagram

10:27 i sanitize my hands twice then go to my room and put vaseline on my lips

10:28 i go back to the couch and sanitize my hands twice

10:30 i check instagram and scratch my face. i need to play more sims but im scared of my laptop. my brain tells me i cant wear gloves while touching the keys though

11:06 i dont know what i did. i hand sanitized i think. i was on my phone. oh i went to get my keyboard cover but it didn’t fit its for the wrong keyboard so then i went on amazon to get a new one but then i remembered i wanted a nail kit so i looked up nail kits and one looked familiar so then i looked in my bathroom and i already owned it so i grabbed it and then i spent a half hour just picking at my cuticles. then i went on instagram and checked my messages and mail.

11:09 i check instagram

11:10 i text ace and kon. im down bad over augustina and i gave myself a brief hope that she liked me but i know its not true. i dont want to mess anything up there. ace is encouraging me that it might be true but i cannot have any expectations and i need to focus on more realistic relationships.

11:19 i sanitize my hands. sam is making mac and cheese bitea

11:20 i get up and take an edible. i talk to sam about my augustina dilemma and he laughs and says hes glad hes only focusing on videogames rn.

11:22 i use a tissue to open the cabinet and grab a mason jar. i open my wine and pour some. i sip while i talk to sam about the sims

11:23 i walk over and sanitize my hands

11:25 i go to my room and change out of my white shirt first into a tank top but then a tshirt cuz i dont want to be cold. i go outside sanitize my hands and pour more wine. i didnt change my slippers in my room i just walked in there with my socks

11:42 i checked instagram and obey me. im kind of drunk already oops. sams mac and cheese balls are done. i keep thinking about augustina. i texted her but its late in ny so shes probably asleep. im so dumb for even considering this as a possibility but im crossed and tired lmao and im allowed to be down bad and be unrequited every once in a while !!!!

11:44 i sanitize three times. i decide not to play the sims i close my laptop and sanitize again

11:48 i texted augustina about hanging out soon because i miss seeing her

11:50 i regret sending it. i send ace and kon the texts and they tell me they sound normal. my edible hits